Many of you know my husband went home to be with the Lord a little over a week ago. I’d love to tell you one trip through grief makes the next one easier…maybe…maybe not. Every grief is unique. But I thought maybe some of you missed this series when I first posted in 2012…and I’m rereading and learning too. Many blessings and the peace of God’s comfort to each one of you grieving the loss of a loved one.
Those of you who follow my blog know my husband and I lost a daughter eleven years ago. Michelle’s death plunged us into deep, inky waters of grief. While struggling just to survive we were blind-sided by Grief’s ugly-step-sisters—Secondary Losses.
Grief is an unwelcome guest who stays much too long, not pretty at all, who plunges the family into chaos. But Secondary Losses are the evil relatives of Grief that slip in the back-door and linger forever. They litter the landscape with shrapnel-sized-shards of anguish that are often as difficult to deal with as the original loss.
Worse yet, they lurk behind the shadow of family members, good friends, even making appearances at happy events. Ever waiting to earn the greatest buck-for-the-bang and then they implode. The injuries they inflict are not terminal, but often perpetrate permanent disabilities upon their victims.
So what in the world are secondary losses?
Well…
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MOVING THE ANCIENT BOUNDARIES 